Things Just Come To Me
There are so many things that I want to say! Sometimes it happens after I’ve read a really awesome Scripture. Or it might be that I wake up from a dream with a thought bouncing around in my head. Other times ideas just seem to come from out of thin air. And I think of millions of ways to say it.
But most of the time, I never do.
Then I’ll kick myself later, theoretically, for not saying it. It’s a vicious cycle! But I can’t help it. I’m GREAT with writing things down for the most part. There are times when things flow from my head to my fingers and onto the screen with little to no effort at all. And sometimes, it’s like there’s a dam somewhere between that just flat out won’t let anything through.
I don’t know why that is, but right now, it’s the world I’m living in. Maybe it will break at some point. I have SO much penned down on little bits of paper, on cards in my Bible and post it notes stuck up on my desk. If I ever get rolling, I’m likely to have blog content for months!
Is There Another Way?
At one point I thought, hey, I know! I’ll just do videos. When some thoughts come to me, it goes through my head as if I were telling it to someone. So I thought that might be an easier route.
Not so much!
Attempting to talk in front of a camera completely shuts me down. Which is crazy, because I’ve been in front of people pretty much my whole life. Never mind the fact that I’m crazy self conscious and 200% introvert! It’s just the way it always was.
Not so much the past few years though, and maybe that’s part of the problem. I don’t know. All I know is that I freeze in front of a camera. Thank goodness I don’t have to do THAT for a living! My goodness, I’d be in bad shape.
It’s bad, too, because it seems like God has really been pushing me to share my testimony in video format. But that’s something I haven’t even been able to write about. I mean, yeah, little snippets pop out into my writing from blog post to blog post. But I’ve never actually sat down and wrote the whole thing out, lock, stock and barrel. Maybe that’s why God keeps bringing videos to my mind? Maybe there’s an ice breaker in there somewhere if I’ll just DO it.
I’m No Bible Teacher!
When I say that there’s so much I want to say, it isn’t that I feel like I have anything to teach. At one point, a couple of months ago, I wanted to lead a Bible study so much! But I found out real quick, I’m not a Bible teacher. It came out while trying to make a video of my first Bible study…
Or maybe it was that it was the video format. It might have just been that I don’t feel confident in that forte because I’ve never actually walked in it. Whatever it is, it just doesn’t feel right.
But! That doesn’t mean that I can’t tell you about things I’ve gone through and witnessed and seen for myself. Even Peter said, we can only talk about what we’ve seen and heard. THAT is how I feel! If I could just tell you what Jesus has done for me! If I could just give you a glimpse of the love He has available for me and you and everyone else too!
Who knows. Maybe one day I will. In the mean time, y’all pray for me!