In all that we have been through lately… stuff with the car, stuff with work, stuff with the kids… it’s all been pretty weighty. I don’t go into a lot of detail here, because these are the same kinds of problems we all have. Everybody’s car breaks down, everybody’s kids have some point where they just don’t listen, there are just certain things that most folks would consider normal, you know?
The thing is, I recently just plopped down in one of my prayer spots and started getting real honest with God. So much so, that I had to repent that if I had said anything out of line to THE MOST HIGH GOD, that it would be forgiven me that I let my flesh rise up!!
So anyway, I was asking hard questions. I can’t even remember what all they were. It went something like this: “Well, Jesus, if the Word says THIS, but we are experiencing THIS, why don’t we know why? Why aren’t things clearer when we are pouring our heart out to you prior to and through the midst of, every event? If the Word says we can stand on it, and we stand on it, why isn’t it coming to pass? Why are we afflicted to the point that it seems like the enemy is bullying us?”
(And so on.)
You know how it is… we act like fussy, obstinate children sometimes. Just wanna be coddled, nothing else will do.
So I repented and went on off knowing that the JOY of the LORD is my STRENGTH. Knowing that He who has begun a good work in us will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ. Knowing that we are troubled, but not distressed. Perplexed, but not in despair! (2 Corinthians 4:8)
So last night, we had to make a quick run up the road for a couple of things and to see how our vehicle repairs were holding up. When we arrived at our destination, only a few short miles up the road, we saw that it wasn’t fixed. Mind you, it wasn’t as bad as when it started… but it wasn’t completely rectified either.
It’s times like THIS… times when you’ve prayed and fasted and stood on the word, times that you’ve testified ALREADY to the goodness of God in taking care of needs, etc., that you’ll get real low if you’re not careful.
And that’s the direction I was starting to go!
We have people praying for us and over the situation. Might I just add right here that this “situation” has been ongoing, off and on, for a really long time? We’ve had people pray and pray and pray, and we’ve prayed and prayed and prayed.
I have to admit, it wasn’t just the discouragement in a vehicle that’s still not up to par that was getting to me. It was the look in my unsaved daughter’s eyes when I declare that we are in the Hand of a Living God, who said that we would have everything that pertains to life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3). I mean, I know that we are not completely forsaken. I know THAT. It’s just a lot harder when we can’t get to church, or to get groceries, or things of that nature.
I was contemplating all of this as we started our short ride back home. (Remember, you don’t have to be on an altar or on your knees or in your prayer closet to pray… He is always with you!) I had the window down and I just happened to look down at the shadow the light was making as it came off the side of the van.
One could say it was “running lights” as my Daddy used to call them. The ones on the side. But I’m going to try to explain what I saw…
The light was casting both illumination and shadow down onto the asphalt. It created a space, if I were to have measured it, that would have been about 2-3 feet long (measuring from the side of the van out toward the side of the road), and about a foot and a half wide (from front to back).
It was in the perfect shape of an eye.
Now, that in and of itself might not seem like much. Light does some pretty crazy things. BUT… along one edge of that eye, and I watched this all the way home and it remained, there were shadows of what looked like eyelashes. Great detail. I tried to imagine what could be casting that kind of shadow, but nothing made sense.
In the center of the “light” or “shadow”, whichever it could best be classified as was a round darker shadow that made up what looked to be the pupil of the eye. Again, none of these aspects ever moved. As the van ran along down the road, it ran along just beside. And I felt a stir in my spirit…
As I stared that that “eye”, it was as if I heard God speak to me: Focus on the eye. Nothing else. So I did. And suddenly, the blur that was the rest of the world just seemed to fade away, the eye becoming more pronounced.
And then I heard Him speak again. If I am your focus, you won’t see anything besides Me. And that’s exactly what I want from you. Focus on ME and let ME deal with what’s out there.
If I had been making that up in my head, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have felt that ice-cold, butterfly feeling you get in your stomach when you truly feel the Holy Ghost starting to rise up. I knew it was God’s way of giving me peace about the situation and for once in this whole crazy situation, I had no worries.
I don’t know the future. At this point, I’m not even sure what’s right around the corner of the next day, as far as our vehicle goes. But I DO know that He will never leave us nor forsake us! I am claiming the victory because where HE is, there can be NOTHING ELSE.
You see, the thing is, we don’t have some magic potion for getting things done the way we want them done. While there is IMMENSE power in the Name of Jesus, it’s not our calling it out that brings HIM into the SITUATION. He is always near, always there, with an ever-watchful eye!
No, it is the rising up of the Holy Ghost full of power and might. It is the PRESENCE of the Holy Ghost in our midst. It is the all-consuming power that made Moses’ face shine so brightly the Hebrew children preferred not to even look at him when he came down from the mountain.
Let’s create an atmosphere. Praise, worship, prayer, testimony… these are the things we should focus on. NOT… “Why aren’t my prayers getting answered when I said all the right words??”
Remember my clarion call: WORKS because of FAITH… not FAITH because of WORKS.
Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!Psalm 107